Merry Christmas and Happy Holiday season to all of my blog subscribers.

Look for lots of new stuff from Homer in 2007. God bless you all.

Homer

My 30th Birthday Remembered
October 28, 2005- The day before I turned 30. Many family and friends came to our house to celebrate my 30 years of life. My beautiful wife had been planning this get together for a week or so. The food was good, the cake was good, we all had a good time. When it came time to open presents I received, quite possibly the best birthday gift I have ever received.
It was from Dawn (the beautiful wife I referred to previously). Before I unwrapped it I could tell that it was a book...it felt very bookish. As I removed the wrapping paper I saw that the book was called "Conversations with Bono". For those of you who don't know, I am a huge U2 fan. I think they are easily one of the greatest bands of all time. Bono is the "front man" for the band. If you didn't know that you seriously need to acquaint yourself with them. It would be good for you.
I was extremely pleased with the book. I looked at the cover. Turned it over. Looked at the back cover. Looked at the front again. "Wow. I really like this book!" When I looked up from the picture of Bono I saw everyone in the room looking at me as if something was still going to happen...like I hadn't even received the gift yet...they were all smiling...I am beginning to feel a little awkward at this point...so, I smile back...people begin to lean into their stares...coming up from their seats..."Good Lord! Where are my manners?"...I thank my beautiful wife for the great book...people are smiling so big now they are starting to look as stupid as I feel..."what is wrong with these people?"..."do they want me to read them the book?"..."I'll pass is around"..."then they will have to quit looking at me"...
About that time, Dawn tells me to open the book. So, I open the cover and inside is two tickets to the U2 concert in Dallas then next night!!! Now I understand why everyone was looking at me the way they were! I would be in Dallas. In the American Airlines Center. At a U2 concert on my exact birthday! I told you this was the best birthday gift ever!
Birthdays are usually fun, but some ages are more milestones than others. I remember turning 10. "Double digits baby! All my fingers!". 13 is a big one. "I'm a teenager". 16. "Legal driving age". 18. "Legal voting age". 20. "All of my fingers and toes!". 21. "Legal drinking age". After that, the milestone birthdays sort of trail off. 30 is a big one though. It's one I will never forget.
October 29, 2005- My birthday. In my mind I will always see myself walking into the big 3-0 to my favorite U2 songs with my beautiful wife and best friend at my side, both of us singing and dancing with 10,000 other people, all of us connected because of the band.
Experience what we experienced that night by clicking the links below. These are the exact concert we were at!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MFaIK-PtfUU
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SbUVynqh91g
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FBVDOjOb1OU
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LVkmRZ5RQmY
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x9KWiavUXrQ
Thanks to my wife for a night I will never forget.

I love reality tv, BUT...
Sometimes I get tired of seeing people run down, exploited and emotionally destroyed for the sake of "my viewing pleasure". I have watched some episodes of the Bachelor over the past few seasons and the end of every show is the same every time. Some poor girl, who was only chosen to be on the show because she has an out-going personality, a ton of money and/or an hour-glass figure, gets carted off in a limo, crying and talking about her regrets and how the guy just made the "biggest mistake of his life". How am I supposed to feel happy for "Bor-enzo" and Jen when there are two dozen other people in their wake who have had their feelings ripped apart, their emotions crushed and been completely embarrassed. Every time I see those girls crying I get mad all over again. Not only were many of them mislead to believe that they could win the guy, but the tv people completely used these girls to make money. It's sick and angering and it sets a terrible example to people in the dating realm. It's no wonder that half of all marriages end in divorce...we are trained that it is ok to "love", date or be comitted to multiple people at a time. These men who must chose between all of the girls are usually confused as to who they should end up with because the way they go about "getting the girl" is completely wrong. It's wrong and it sets people up to have their marriages and relationships destroyed. Maybe the girls in the limo are actually being spared some pain.

It's already happening... It happens every single year about this time... I'm not suprised by it but it does bother the heck out of me... The thing I am refering to has, in recent years, pushed me to dislike Christmas. I complained about Christmas so much one year that my Mom-in-law gave me a Grinch neck tie as a joke. I have come back to liking Christmas since then, but I still have some major problems with some people and their love of this holiday.

Don't stop reading now. Don't send me hate mail or negative comments telling me that I hate baby Jesus. I don't want you to assume that I am anti-family, anti-giving, anti-presents etc. Please hear me out.

I'll spare you the long story about my childhood, a tanish station-wagon and long nights driving through neighbourhoods looking at Christmas lights with my family. I love my family, I just hate Christmas lights. I think I'd rather chew on a broken bottle or maybe try to swallow the jagged shards of a chicken bone... I don't know if my past has anything to do with my dislike of the currently popular pre-Christmas festivities. It might. Either way, I have problems.

I don't like Christmas lights being put out during October or 80% of November. They don't belong. They are freaking CHRISTMAS lights. I don't like it when people begin displaying their fully decorated Christmas Tree before Thanksgiving. I want to destroy things when I hear dorky Christmas music playing in the mall before December 1. Please, if you are a Christmas enjoyer, by all means, live it up! Shop till you drop, decorate your house, wear your favorite puff-paint Christmas sweatshirt every day as long as it is December. On the flip side, most of us don't leave out our Christmas stuff until Feruary...do we? If you do, please put it up around New Years or so.

Dear Christmas over lover, by the time Christmas gets here I'm usually already tired of it. You have made me tired of it because you skipped over Thanksgiving. Because you sang your stupid Amy Grant Christmas album over and over and over. Because you talk about things like Christmas cheer and then you turn around and return all of your Christmas gifts because you would rather have gotten something else.

I think my main problem is that most people completely skip over a time of "giving thanks", being grateful and acknowledging our blessings to get to a time of over spending, over wanting and over doing. We might all enjoy Christmas a little more if we went into that season after coming out of a time of being thankful. We all have so much already and most of us don't think twice about where or who what we have came from because we are already focusing on getting more.

I like the Charlie Brown Christmas special. In it, I think Linus says that Christmas has become "over commercialized". I agree with you Linus. That is a good observation for a kid who carries a blanket, sucks his thumb and has a huge dent in his head.

If you are planning on pulling out the Christmas decor soon, I would ask you to rethink. Wait until after Thanksgiving. Go into celebrating the birth of Christ on the heals of Thanksgiving. Give it a try. I think you'll like it.

New Addition to the Family and the Blog
Well, this post is a little over-due...better a little late than never...right? Anyway, for those of you who care, (those of you who don't- you're not my friend anymore) my first child was born on September 7. The last 45 days or so have been awesome! We named him Levi David. He is a very cool little baby. Here's a picture for your viewing pleasure:

Dancing Dogs
Some friends showed me this site last night. You can upload a picture of your face and a friends face, put them on male and female bodies in hilarious costumes and add wigs or hats. Now that is pretty funny by itself...but then the bodies dance to this groovy song. It is too much fun!
So, being the person that I am, I decided it would be funny to upload pictures of my dogs and make them dance. It is pretty stinkin' funny!
From Petie and Daisy: "So, we dedicate this dance to each and every time we pee on "Mabel's" fence. To every single time we bark at her like we've never seen her before. Mabel, for every one of your "eye-rolls", head shakes and rude comments. This one's for you Mabel!"
http://www.dancesisterdance.com/myvid/index.php?v=3430dcf41ec90

Thanks and props to Brooks and Amber. Ya'll are the bomb. Pink tights are awesome.

My guess is that there is one in every neighborhood. The cliche, busy body, into everybody's business, nosey, neighborhood watchdog, old lady. There is one in almost any TV show you watch. That's why I guess there is actually one in every neighborhood.
Well, the "watchdog" on our street just happens to share a property line with me. Nothing is ever good enough for her. Not just on our street, but in the whole world. She complains about everything. She wears me out.
Some of our history with, let's just call her Mabel, goes like this.
1. When we got our dog Petie almost 4 years ago, Mabel frowned and asked us if "that dog" was going to live outside. From that day on she referred to him as "Peavie".
2. When we got our other dog, Daisy Mae, 2 years ago, Mabel referred to her as "Dixie".
3. On Christmas 2004, my wife let Petie out into the backyard to pee, like we do every morning. As "Peavie" lifted his leg to relieve his bladder, Mabel burst out of her back door screaming something about "that dog" and "killing her grass". Mabel then screamed at my wife. Not nice Mabel. Not nice.
Obviously, Mabel hates our dog. I think she hates most of our neighbors too. She continually calls the police on the man who lives behind her because his yard is messy. I resisted the temptation to call the police on her when the addition she was having built on the back of her home took 11 months to complete. She comments on the yard across the street from her, "All of those yard decorations are tacky". I wonder if she has ever thought about the fact that the woman who lives there is confined to a wheelchair and loves to be outside...I wonder if she could get over the "tacky-ness" and be happy that the lady across the street can enjoy her yard. She gripes about people parking too close to her driveway. She complains about the length of people's grass. All in all, this woman is a nuisance. She should complain about herself.
Anyway, I came home from lunch today to see a "lovely" sight... I wanted to throw up my jalapeno burger. Thanks for messing up the view Mabel. Anybody want to trade nosey, over-bearing, rude neighbors?











Mabel's nasty pantyhose drip-dry in the Central Texas heat. GROSS!

Tragedy
Many things that happen in life are difficult to explain. I would even go so far as to say that some things have no explanation. Maybe that is true, maybe its not. I'm not going to argue about it. However, I do know that we don't get an explanation for everything that happens and I know that we aren't entitled to one.
Why do good people get taken advantage of? Why do children die of cancer? Why do old people die of cancer for that matter? I don't know and I refuse to give some trite, cliche answer or idea as to why they do in fact happen. Sometimes its better to just admit that we don't know everything and trust that there is Someone who does.
We had a recent tragedy in our family. No on the same level as someone discovering cancer in their body or even someone losing their job, but tragic none the less.
Here are the main players and how it all went down:



This is my wifes dog Petie. He is an 80 pound Boxer. We have had Petie for almost 4 years. We call him The Browner, Buster Brown, Buster Browner, Brown Bear, Browner Bear etc.
Believe me, I know we're ridiculous, but he's a cool dog.









This is my dog, Daisy Mae. She is a 50 pound boxer. She is almost 2 years old. We call her the Scamp because that is what she is. A scamp. Webster defines "scamp" as a rogue or rascal. Daisy Mae is both.





Recently, Petie and Daisy decided they wanted to "start a family". So they began "trying". My wife and I "discovered" this one morning when the dogs were in the back yard. Needless to say, we hoped that "once wouldn't be enough".

It was.

Almost 10 weeks later, poor Daisy had gained 15-20 pounds and her due date was quickly approaching. I'll cut out some gross details about taking dog's temperature rectally, chewing umbilical cords, eating birth sacks and placentas (Daisy did those last few things, not me).
Once she started popping those little babies out, she didn't stop. The first pup came out around 3am on Saturday, August 19. The last one was birthed 13 hours later at 4pm. During those 13 hours, Daisy had 13 puppies. That's right. 13. A bakers dozen. All of them were healthy. They were all beautiful. Some were fawn colored, like Daisy. Others were brindle like Petie. We even had two white pups. They were all feeding and moving and squeaking. Daisy was doing great. Licking her precious babies one by one. It was amazing. She knew exactly what to do to take care of them. She didn't even go to birthing classes or breast feeding classes.
This is Daisy with about 8 or 9 of her pups. It's hard to believe that she still had 4-5 pups in her at that time... Neither of the white ones had been born yet.

Here's where the tragedy comes in. After about 24 hours after the last pup was born, they started acting weird. Labored breathing. Seizure like stiffness and then completely limp. One pup died. Then a second. Those were both before we went to bed on Sunday night. We woke up at 4am on Monday morning to see that six more had died during the night. I called the vet as soon as I could and scheduled an appointment for the remaining 5 pups and Daisy. Two more died before the appointment.
At the vet, we learned that Daisy was not producing enough milk to feed her babies. The vet said, "Daisy had the deck stacked against her from the beginning. A normal first liter is 6-7 pups. Daisy had double that. She is a little under weight and she is a little calcium deficient. There was no way she could have fed all of the babies. Daisy should be fine, but I don't have much hope for the pups." I bought Daisy some calcium tablets and the three remaining pups some dog milk. We were to feed the babies through a eye dropper every 2 hours and keep them warm. Within 6 hours, two more pups died.

We fed the last pup until his 1 week birthday. He made it that long. He was a fighter. We called him Survivor. Late on Saturday night, Survivor died while Dawn was holding him. I think he had caught a cold or something. When he exhaled I could hear something rattling in his chest. He was too young and weak, plus Daisy's milk never came in. Tragic.

Now, here we are, back to the present. Dawn and I are doing fine and preparing for a baby of our own. Daisy Mae is doing ok...Actually, she is doing great...Remember, she is a scamp. Scamps tend to bounce back quickly I guess. Petie, as always is awesome but he's not quite sure what he is going to do with all of the cigars he bought...

Enjoyment vs Talent and Mean vs Honest
I will be the first to admit that I am a fairly average guy. I have no problem saying that because I know that it is true. I am comfortable with my average-ness. Would I be happy if I had unbelievable athletic ability and was making millions of dollars in pro sports? Sure! What if I had superior musical talent and #1 hits naturally flowed from my mouth and guitar like refreshing, cold water from a spring? That would be great too! I tried my hand at both of those things, only to find, you guessed it, that I am pretty normal.
However, there are some people in this wonderful world that don't see things as I have described above. Many of these people are young and without much "life experience". They will learn soon enough. Others are mixed up in their thinking. So mixed up that they believe if they enjoy something then they are in fact good at that activity. Enjoyment does not equal talent. Pleasure does not make you a star. It is these people that I would like to discuss today.
Have you ever watched American Idol? If you haven't watched or aren't interested in people who sing, you should at least tune is for the first few episodes of the show. If you do so, Ryan Seacrest will host you through the "try out" process of AI. Thousands and thousands and thousands of people will try to make the cut, hoping to become the next super star. It is during these episodes of the show where many of the "I enjoy singing so therefore I am good at singing" people show up. Here are a few:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QOIGTmkRLAE
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cnakXkddTZQ
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xWJ-JaE6GIU&mode=related&search=
My favorite, by far is scat girl...what in the heck was that high note at the end?!
Anyway, back to the blog at hand. Why did these people try out for AI? They are not even average singers...they are terrible. Obviously Fox puts them on TV because they are entertaining and make good tv, but these poor people actually thought they had a chance to win the contest! They people enjoy singing. Are they good at singing? These people exist outside the music world as well. They are in almost every aspect of life.
I feel sorry for these people. #1. They made fools of themselves on national tv. #2. No one in their lives loved them enough to tell the that they aren't good singers. In fact, many had just the opposite happen. "Mommy has told me all my life that I am a wonderful singer." "Dad has always said that I am a great athlete." *A Side Note to Parents, encourage your children, ofcourse, but don't push them into embarrassment or towards public ridicule. That is a dis-service to your kid.* If you are one of these people take note. If you love guitar and know some chords and have some guitar gear, please be realistic about your talent and skill. Enjoy realistically.
Another thing that American Idol has caused me to realize is that people can't take honesty. Simon Cowell is a little mean sometimes, but he is honest. I think that honest people are mistaken for mean sometimes. Honest people "call it like they see it." To them, "a spade is a spade", while others may call it something else. Honesty is under-rated. Honesty is a buried treasure. Honesty is a priceless friend. Honesty is a refreshing drink. Honesty is a cool breeze. Honesty is a medium rare ribeye. Honesty is a wonderful surprise. Honesty is healing medicine. Honesty is a beautiful song. Honesty is the perfect answer.
Sometimes honesty might sting a little bit, but it is the best thing for us in the long run. It is the best thing for other people too. When honesty stings we are not hurt, we are helped. When honesty burns we are made stronger, not destroyed. The pain will go away soon, the embarrassment will fade and you and I will honestly know ourselves and others better.
Use honesty with care. Use it to help. Use it constructively. Be honest.

Many Christians Have It Backwards
I am reading "Blue Like Jazz" by Donald Miller right now. About 10 different people have recommended the book to me over the last year. I have liked what I have read so far. Sometimes I don't know where Miller is going but his point is always clear at the end of the chapter. Blue Like Jazz is basicially a collection of non-religious thoughts on religion and God. Interesting and entertaining. Relevant. All Christians would do well to read it.
Last Sunday night I proped myself up in bed and opened to my bookmark. As I read, one thought in particular jumped off page 132 and punched me in the face about ten times. Talk about a "paper-back-beat-down"! Here's the quote, "...I want my spirituality to rid me of hate, not give me reason for it." OUCH!
Miller was referencing a conversations he overheard where church going Christians were professing their hate for former President Clinton. How many of us are guilty of the same or a similar thing. How many times have we flipantly threw the powerful word "hate" around like a pair of dirty socks. Here's a tougher question, how many times has our religion been our reasoning behind that hate? Some may say, "I hate homosexuals because my religion says they are wrong." Some may say, "I hate Muslims because they don't believe the same as I do." Others may say, "I hate liberals because they support abortion and it's wrong." You get the idea... I have made statements like this before, maybe you have too.
Here's the deal though...as believers in Christ, we should very serriously consider if those statements reflect the life, actions and message of the One we say that we follow. Did Christ ever get mad or angry? Yes. Sadly enough He was usually mad at the "religious". Did Christ ever get emotional? Ofcourse. He called people "snakes" and flipped tables over. Sounds like a WWF match. Did Christ ever hate or profess to hate anyone? No. Never. Not a chance.
Christ came to heal the sick, seek the lost, save the injured and accept the rejected. You see?
So why do we as His followers deal hate out so often? Do we think that it is possible to hate someone into faith in Christ? Do we think that making a "stand" against things we don't believe in gives us the right to hate others? Are we afraid of different people so we mask our fear with hate? Are we told, directly or indirectly, as kids to hate those who aren't like us? I don't have a clue why we do it, but we do.
I agree with Miller, our spirituality should rid us of anger. We should become like Christ. He was a dealer of love and acceptance and forgiveness and healing. We should strive to be that too. Living like that is possible. I am trying. You should too. I think this kind of life change would make a huge impact on our families, churches, friends and more importantly, the Kingdom of God and Its influence on todays world.
Thanks to Donald Miller for the eye-opening book and the slapping around I got on page 132.

A Home on the Road
Normally I am a fairly mild mannered guy. Normally I can control my emotions through a large variety of situations. Normally I don't think about running people off of the road at high speeds. But sometimes I don't find myself in "normal" situations.
When you have been in the "business" that I am in for the legnth of time that I have been in it, you get to hear lots of stupid jokes, riddles and things like that. I don't particularly enjoy them. I don't care if "round bales of hay are being outlawed because cows can't get a square meal out of them". Not only do I not care to hear that joke one time, I don't care to hear it 10 times... Anyway, I digress. There is one saying that I have heard that applys to the topic of this blog. It goes something like this, "Why do people park in a driveway and drive on a parkway?". Hmmm... That's a good question, but I don't care to answer it or even discuss it. Please read on.
Have you ever been on a trip and been stuck behind someone who is driving 12 miles per hour under the speed limit? Have you ever been stuck behind someone who varies their speed so much that you are spending equal time on the brake and the gas? Although those situations can be maddening, when the opportunity presents itself, simply move into another lane, stomp your gas petal to the floor, glare at the person as you pass them, move in front of them and leave them in the black smoke of your VW TDI Jetta. That's what I usually do...
But what about this? Sometimes I find myself driving behind a HOUSE! A HOUSE on WHEELS! Being pulled by a TRUCK! Driving UNDER THE SPEED LIMIT! Blocking ALL LANES! SWERVING! I'm not sure why, but these homes on wheels seem to always be going where I am going. And for some reason, they always leave a little bit ahead of me. They frustrate me to no end. They plague me. I hate them. Have you ever seen those things? Nothing makes me want to shoot flaming arrows Dukes of Hazzard style like homes on wheels. Do you know what I am talking about?
Why are the tires on those things so SMALL? You're pulling a HOUSE for the love... I actually saw one of those mini-tires explode under the pressure of the home it was holding one time. A little scary. Why can't these houses be built on location like normal houses? Why can't their materials ride on a normal truck? Why do they drive during the day? Couldn't they drive at night so as to not hold up traffic?
One time I got stuck behind this enormous piece of equipment traveling through Mexia. It was so big that a man actually got out of the truck and lifted a pole up to the traffic signals to push them out of the way so there was room for the truck to drive under. Each light that was encountered took about 5 minutes and there are about 6 lights in Mexia. I was frothing at the mouth.
So, next time you are on the road, watch out for moving houses. They will make you red in the face. Don't even think about passing them. You can't. They hog the whole road and they can't move to the shoulder because they have go-cart tires. If you are lucky enough to not encounter one of the homes on wheels, then maybe you could ask the question, "Why do people park their cars at home and drive their homes down the road?". If that doesn't work, you can always talk about the shapes of hay...

Loved-Ones, Please Speak Up
We see them everywhere we go. Maybe you see her at the mall, her bangs feathered 4 inches high. We all have seen him as we drive, mowing his lawn in shorts and black dress socks. I most recently saw her at the Texas Rangers game on June 30th. Her condition was difficult to tastefully explain, so I will show you her picture, but be warned, it's not for the easily nauseated. Can anyone say, "OUCH!"?
Who are these people that make such seemingly horrible decisions concerning their appearance? They are our fathers, our aunts, our grandparents and our friends. They may even be us!
Some have already combined to help the fashionless, but how many people can "What Not to Wear" reach? Seriously, I can't watch that dude for very long... he bugs!
Those of us who recognize these problems when we see them, do we have a responsibility to say something? Do we owe it to society to bring the wayward back into the fashion fold? Ofcourse we DON'T! If these people were to hear that their bangs, or their socks were 25 years outdated they might be offended or have their feelings hurt. If they were to hear from a total stranger that their bite was so far up their butt-crack that their spine was visible, they might become embarrassed. So, since a stranger can't point these things out, who has the ability to do so? Should the fashion offenders even be told? Should they be left alone to dress how they choose?
I believe that if these people are to be helped, if we are to be helped, only those closest to the problem can help it. If the offender is actually my father and I do see the offence, I alone am responsible to help. If your aunt feathers her 4 inch bangs, only you can help change the behavior. If you are the person in the red shirt in the above picture, you should have said something before the game, no, you should have said something before you left the house. You owe it to the rows of people sitting behind you, they don't want to see that- You Should Have Said Something! You owe it to the offender, save them some embarrassment- You Should Have Said Something! You owe it to yourself, you love these people, be bold, they love you too, they will listen to you. We will listen to you.
PLEASE SAY SOMETHING!

Father's of Note
The term "deat-beat-dad" is thrown around a lot in today's culture. Some of these "men" refuse to support their children finantially. Others don't support their children by any other means other than money. Some of these men don't realize that their kids are their responsibility, so they spend ten times more time playing XBox 360 than they do playing with their kids. Anyway, I digress...
Last Sunday was Father's Day. This was a significant day for me since my wife and I are expecting our first child to be born around September 10. I was forced to think about the kind of dad I want to be for all of my future kids. So naturally, I thought about some fathers that I have observed over the 30 years of my life.
First off, my own dad. I have always said that if I become half the man that he is, I will be happy. He has been a perfect example of how to provide for a family. There is no one I know with a better work ethic. He taught me how to sacrifice for those I love. He taught me to seek the Lord 100%. As a boy, I thought my dad could fix anything...come to think of it...I still do. Thanks dad. You're the best.
Secondly, my Father-In-Law. I have observed in him over the last 7-8 years many things that I would do well to apply to my life. I have learned more about business, money and taking risks that I ever thought was out there. I have seen this father take out my mother-in-law on a weekly basis. I have learned how to get a killer tan. I also have overcome my fear of talking on my cell phone while in the bathroom. Thanks dad Mellon.
Another dad who I look up to is Dr. Tim. He has taught his sons how to be men. They know he loves them because of the hours and hours he has spent with them teaching how to hunt and fish. Thanks.
Many of my friends and in-laws (Chris, Scott, Mike, Jesse, Brett, Ronny, Trent and many others) already have children of different ages. Thank you for the examples you have unknowingly been to me as you raise your children.
Anyway, I thought some good dads deserved some credit.

ASSUME
This is a funny word. My high school soccer coach taught me one lesson I will always remember...and it wasn't about soccer (needless to say, he was a terrible coach). We'll get to that lesson in a few lines.
I find it irritating that so many people today think so highly of themselves. Surely the way they do their job is vastly superior to the way anyone else might do the same job. Surely the route they drive through town is the correct route. Surely the experiences they have had are head and shoulders above the experiences of others. Ofcourse they are correct on any subject no matter if they actually have any knowledge of that subject or not. They are right. Didn't you know?
What this boils down to is that many people in our society today love themselves so much that they naturally think everyone else should (or does) love them that much too. They think everyone else should get in line behind them and follow along like the sad little misinformed people they are. Heck, maybe the misinformed will be smart enough to take advantage of being in the presence of of such a wonderfully smart person and learn something. Right..........
On to the funny word. These people are actually assuming that they are correct or right or best or whatever. They assume that the rest of the world wants to or should be like them. Because it works for them, they assume that it will work for someone else. Here's the lesson from my coach... When we assume something about someone (follow along here) we make an (mentally separate the first three letters of the word assume from the last three letters, now separate the last two letters from the "u") (are you getting it?)...
Let me help: When we assume, we make an ass/u/me. When we assume, we make everyone involved look silly and the funniest part is that the person doing the assuming usually doesn't realize that they look silly!
What's the lesson all of us need to learn here? (I'm not assuming that I am an expert on this or that I can teach this to anyone. I am including myself in the learner category) Don't think so highly of yourself, myself, ourselves. Don't think that we are the authority in every situation and on every topic. Let's make a deal. I won't assume if you won't. Let's think about each other before we think about ourselves. Let's practice good, clear, open communication. Let's ask good questions. Let's not be so quick to offer our "expert" advice. Let's be careful and caring listeners. Let's not offer solutions so brashly. Does this work for you? Is it a deal?

Who really thinks this is cool?
Recently, while visiting some friends, I watched the CMA Award Show. For those of you who aren't fans of country music, this is the yearly Country Music Awards show. I would not classify myself as a huge country music fan but I was interested to see if Carrie Underwood would win any awards. Yes, I like Carrie Underwood, what of it!?
Anyway, on to the main topic of this "rant". During many of the performances through out the show there was a group of maybe 100-200 fans who were allowed to sit close to the performance stage. As I watched I was disturbed to see these fans start waving their hands in unison. Back and fourth, both arms extended skyward, palms facing the stage, right to left and back again...
I have seen this "move" many times before. It seems that this "dance" is destined to happen at every concert across the world at some point. I have seen it happen numerous times at youth camps and even during church services. My question is this: Why in the world do people do this?
I think this "dance", or whatever you want to call it, began by accident. Someone motioned for a friend and their wave happened to be in sequence with the beat of the song. For some unknown reason others thought this looked really "cool" so they joined in. Maybe it began in the '60's or '70's. Some pot smoking hippie tried to flag down the closest weed salesman and the people behind them (who were also high) thought this type of movement made them fly... I don't know.
Unfortunately, however it began, however long ago it was, people STILL wave their hands in unison today. The even bigger problem is that they STILL think it makes them look cool! No matter what they think, or how they feel, these people are goofy. Ant to the guy who takes it up a notch and adds a Bic lighter in his hand, you sir are an even bigger goof. Never mind the fact that you're dressed completely in denim. I can overlook the fact that your body odor is spreading faster than the bird flu. But please, for the love of God, if you are going to wave, at least wave with the beat! And stop looking around to see who else is waving with you because they are all on left while you are on right. Plus they are all dorks too! And yes, something smells bad...its you. All your waving has worn off your Old Spice underarm cream. To you sir, I hope you keep the Bic light for a long time... maybe a whole song. Long enough that when you put it back in your pocket it burns a hole through your Lee jeans and blisters your thigh!
So, here's to banning the "windshield wiper dance" forever. Here's to inflicting ridicule on people who take part in this activity. Here's to hopping none of us ever see people embarrass themselves in this manner again. Here's to remembering that if you are ever at a concert and feel the impulse to participate in this group dance, you're a NERD if you if you do it!

Please Pull Forward!
I like drive through's because they are convenient. However, some people do not completely understand the concept of a drive through. These people are the topic of my Rant today!
Has this ever happened to you? You are in your car waiting in line at the drive through of your choice (my choice is usually Starbucks). The person in front of you places their order and for some reason only pulls forward about 7 feet! You clearly do not have enough room to get even close to the speaker/microphone so that you may place your order because the last 4 feet of their car is STILL IN FRONT OF THE SPEAKER! This wonderful citizen still has no clue that anyone is in line behind them, plus the fact that they are obviously afraid of the vehicle and driver in front of them- so they are staying cautiously away!
At this point, the employee working the drive through is asking you via the speaker you're not close to, if you would like to try some sort of green tea something-or-other. "No...I just want the idiot in front of me to pull forward a little more!"
4 vehicles in front of you, a happy couple has just received their drinks and is leaving the drive through area. 3 vehicles in front of you a Toyota Pathfinder pulls to the window, 2 cars ahead of you is following closely behind the Pathfinder and then there is your friend...and God only knows what they are doing! They drive forward about another 6 feet, still at a "safe" distance behind the car in front of them, but thankfully you can get close enough to the speaker/microphone to place you order without having to shout. You politely place your order and now the mind-set shifts. I like this part! Now its your turn to make room for the person behind you to order, so what do you do? Well, obviously you must pull forward as far as you can, even if that means making the driver of the vehicle in front of you a little uncomfortable due to the lack of distance between your car and theirs (remember how scared they are of other vehicles).
What is it with those people? They coincidently are usually the same ones who drop their money on the ground, suddenly remember they need to buy a gift card, return their drink immediately and/or refuse to drive away until they have put all of the change into the proper sized slots of the arm rest console.
If you are one of these people, or know one of these people, please, please, please...
PULL YOUR DANG CAR FORWARD!

Mustache- The hair growing on the human upper lip, especially when cultivated or groomed.
When did things begin going so badly for the mustache? What once was a symbol of strength and facial hair growing status now has now been smudged. The mustache has been given a "black eye" if you will. Before the "door knocker" was made so popular by baseball players and youth workers across America (1995-present) there was the mustache.
Commonly refered to today as a "trash-stache", "molestache" or "porn star stache", the mustache in general is not a popular facial grooming style. My question is, "Why?".
Last weekend as I was getting ready for the gambit of graduations, weddings and church services that were coming my way I left my mustache in the "Fu-Manchu" style. I have included a picture of this for your viewing pleasure. When my beautiful wife saw my newly formed 'stache, she informed me that she would not be seen with me at any of the events we would be attending unless I subtracted the addition.

Some very popular and very powerful men have sported 'staches' over the years: Yosemite Sam, Adolph Hitler, Tom Selleck, my uncles Mark and Steve, millions of 11-13 year old boys and more recently Gonzaga basketball player Adam Morrison.

Why are the goatee and the "soul patch" the prefered facial hair styles of today? Is the mustache coming back in style? Did the mustache ever actually go out of style? What type of man, or in some cases woman, keep a mustache? Are facial hair styles cyclical?

I personally think that the goatee will soon join the mustache as out dated. The next popular facial hair style will be the Hulihee.

I would love to hear your thoughts on the mustache.

And until next time, don't forget to style and groom your facial hairs!

Well, this is me. Some call me Homer, others call me Matt, but most just don't call me at all. Now don't feel sorry for me...I like it that way.
Welcome to my blog. I am usually a little behind the cutting edge of technology. Many of my friends have a blog, so I thought I would follow the trend.
I titled my blog, -My Rant-My Ramble- because that is what I tend to do.
An introduction is all I will post for now. Check back soon for my first "real" post. If you would like for me to address a specific topic please let me know and I would be happy to oblige.